19 October 2007

Rest In Peace My Sweet Girl

As those of you who follow my blog know, that with the exception of an occasional MeMe, I don't really bring my personal life into my blog. Today I make an exception. Because today I laid to rest the most loving companion I have ever had.

Sadly, she was with our family for only 15 months. We brought her home on July 5th, 2006. She came to us from Houston Schnauzer Rescue. I fell in love with her the moment I laid eyes on her. And for those of you who don't know, her name IS Bella.

She adopted me as her 'human' and while friendly to the rest of the family...she was MY dog. She loved to play with Fritz. Bella quickly accepted him as both her mate and her mentor. (Aren't they cute together?)



I don't know how long it will take me to fully accept losing her. And the fact that I did absolutely everything I could to take care of her isn't very comforting right now. Because in the end what I couldn't do is protect her from a rare and aggressive cancer. One that took the life out of her in less than a month. One so aggressive that between 9AM and 1PM today, she was lost to me.

We opted to have surgery preformed to remove a tennis ball sized lump in her belly. And most probably the removal of her spleen. But during surgery it was discovered that the cancer had engulfed her liver and there was no hope.

To say that I am heart-broken doesn't begin to describe the loss I feel for her. I'm torn between helplessness and anger. But I know with certainty that I will miss her head lying next to mine while I sleep. I will miss hearing her breath. I will miss her at my side every step I take during the day. I will miss her little tail nub wagging until it's a blur. And I will miss telling her how much I love her.

I'm also sure that Fritz will be lost and lonely, too.


Rest in peace, my sweet little girl. Mom loves you!




11 comments:

Anonymous said...

My heart is with you.
Linda Chase

Ati said...

I am very sorry for you Gerry. The lost of a dog is loosing a family member. They live so close to you every day, so it feels realy empty when they are gone. I wish you strenght! soft hug, Ati.

Dy said...

Oh Gerry, I'm so so sorry. As a MS owner I know how special they can be, but it sounds like the beautiful Bella was Number One. She'll be watching over you.

Sara said...

Gerry, I can not begin to express my sorrow for you. Our dogs and cats become our children and we love them so much. I can tell she was loved and well cared for...and I am so sorry she will not be with on this physical plane...but, I really feel she will still look out for you.

avidcrazyquilter said...

Gerry, Am so sorry for your loss! Something that helped me when I lost my sweet Little'un was remembering that God had sent me an angel just when he thought I needed her, and she left me when someone else needed her more.

Hugs, Julie

loulee said...

(((Hugs))) for you Gerry.

Princess of Everything (and then some) said...

I have no words to make it better. I am glad that ya'll had each other for that short time. I know you made a difference.

queen of everything said...

i am so sorry for your loss.

Gerry said...

Thank you so much for your words of comfort and sympathy. It really means a lot to me.

Tomorrow we go meet our MAYBE new furbaby. There's always love and room for one more!

Pat Winter Gatherings said...

Gerry, I am so sorry to hear of the passing of Bella. I am sorry I haven't been online much to see it earlier. She was beautiful,and I know she loved you and surely was fortunate to have you for her mom during the last year of her life. Please know I am thinking of you in this time of sorrow.Gentle hugs,Pat

Cat said...

I see that Bella was very special. Her eyes are the loving kind. She was so fortunate to have you - she needed the love in return and got it.
Blessings, C