I think I remember April, or was it March??? Honestly, it's all sort of a blur. LOL.
May will be a month that I remember very clearly for a very long time. Our dear son, Mathew and his girlfriend, Merla came to visit the weekend of the 17th. To say that Gene and I were thrilled would be an understatement!
They arrived early on Friday and we spent most of the day just catching up, and grabbing a quick meal at a local diner. It's been eight months since we were last in Utah. And with Mathew settling nicely into home ownership, taking care of all of his pets, and working long and rotating shifts, he doesn't have a lot of free time. It keeps him out of trouble, though.
Saturday we stopped over at the Longmont Farmer's Market, then headed to the Pearl Street Mall and Boulder's Farmer's Market. The weather was just beautiful and was a perfect day for a long, leisurely stroll. There were a number of 'street performers' and other goings on.
This little gal stood so still that you couldn't even see her breathing.
We especially enjoyed this couple. The 'gypsy' music, her work with the accordion, and their great costumes.
We decided to top off of stroll with a stop at Starbucks for a Frappaccino. Then grabbed a couple of tomato plants and some fresh bread before heading home.
Sunday we went to breakfast at Lucille's Creole Café. Again, perfect weather for sitting out on the patio, enjoying an order of beignets and Bloody Mary's, while waiting for their famous Eggs Benedict and Pain Perdu to arrive. After breakfast we headed over to the fairgrounds to see the car show. Mathew has a love of Mustangs and there were plenty to be found that day.
At about 2PM we bid them farewell. It was sad to see them go! I finally understood how my mom felt at the end of our visits.
After a month fighting the upper respiratory infection that I picked up in Lincoln, and starting a second round of antibiotics, I returned to the doctor complaining of chest, breast, and lung pain on my left side. Then after blood tests, chest x-rays and a CT Scan, I was referred to a Pulmonologist. The final diagnosis????? Forty years of smoking a pack a day has just about ruined my lungs! Like no one saw that coming. Luckily, I found out before the effects were completely irreversible - a happy accident, of sorts.
To those of you who have never smoked, you probably either knew and understood the dangers, or are beyond being able to fathom why someone would smoke. Those of you who have quit or are still smoking are probably fully aware of how demanding, expensive and truly dangerous the addiction is. But let me tell you, when you see the damage to your lungs, and discover that your airflow is at 65%, it really drives home the reality of your mistake in judgment!
Even more sad and pathetic is the fact that quitting is still incredibly difficult. Knowing full well the consequences of not quitting doesn't really help with kicking the habit or easing the addiction. I find that the medications are helping, and I'm hopeful that I will be completely quit by the time I return in 2 weeks for my follow up appointment. And while the damage to my lungs might improve a little, the best I can hope for is to stop the progression of damage. Getting back into the gym and watching my diet will also go a long way to improving and maintaining my lung health.
According to my Pulmonologist, most of us can live quite comfortably with a lung capacity/air flow of 65%-80% because we're not running marathons or bicycle couriers in San Francisco. But when that number drops below 65%, your mortality rate jumps drastically. At 50%-35% you're looking at oxygen tanks and just a few short years of agonizing pain before you don't have to worry about doing anything AT ALL!
Long story short - this was my wake up call and I have chosen to live! I also chose to share this bit of shame with you in case you too have had your wake up call and are struggling, or if you are experiencing similar breathing issues and have not yet had your happy accident of discovery.
Until Next time...Happy Needling!!!
Gerry
6 comments:
Good to hear from you, Gerry. Don't you love Boulder? It's special to me and DH because we met in CO and had a lot of fun there. Good luck with your Kicking the Habit. My mom died of bladder cancer, another of the side effects of nicotine. I'm glad you chose life!
I have several friends who have successfully stopped smoking using E Cigs. You might want to ask your doctor about them. I am very proud of you. Good luck!!
Can't wait for the Retreat. This time I will know about half of the ladies.
Hugs,
Bev in Utah
Hi Gerry: It took me trying to stop on at least 10 separate occasions (and I was a light smoker) to finally decide that since nothing worked for me I would try a new tactic that I call cutting back.
It took me 3 years, but I went from about 3/4 of a pack to cutting back 1 cigarette every week for a while, then 1 every 5 days, then 1 every 4 days, etc. etc. Then one day I had an aha moment when cigarettes got to over $50. a carton, and I said when I finished my last pack that would be it. Well I know what it feels like to be out of cigarettes, so when I still had 10 left in my last pack I put it in a drawer, closed it and said that's it, I am not buying or smoking anymore. The fact that I knew they were there physiologically meant I was okay, if that makes any sense. It's been 1 1/2 years and I am still not smoking and the 10 cigarettes are still in the drawer. During stressful times I have been tempted, but managed not to open that drawer.
Sometimes it takes something bad to happen to wake up, and we all hope that we can do it before something bad happens. You can do it!
Blessings to you and yours, Sondra
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Hi Judy,
We don't get to Boulder very often but we do enjoy the Farmer's Market and walking Pearl Street Mall. And there are so many really good places to eat!
Thanks for the encouragement. I'm still struggling with it. And still smoking a couple a day but it's getting easier - for me and for my DH!
I'm sorry to hear that smoking led to your mother's death. There are so many consequences of smoking.
Sadly, we all know what the odds are but somehow, I think, we just don't think it will happen to us.
Take care.
Hi Bev!
How wonderful to see you pop in to visit. I thank you too for your words of encouragement.
I hesitate to take medication or patches, etc. because I don't want to trade on bad habit and addiction for another.
Depending on how it goes, I might need to rethink that stance!
Hi Sondra,
I appreciate that you took the time to share your story with me.
Your situation sounds so much more 'the norm' than what I'm used to hearing about how someone kicked the habit.
I'm just not going to be one of those people who wakes up one day and says, "okay, I'm done" and then goes on my merry way.
I appreciate the support. And kudos to you! You inspire me :-)
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